Monday, October 24, 2011

Mama Cass + Cassie = a whole lotta Cass

Monday mornings make me sad. Especially if I have procrastinated my homework all weekend long {always}

I think Mama Cass and I must be soul mates
[probably because we share a name and an unhealthy desire to eat. . .a lot]
No judgment here because I myself am an ex-heifer but if we are what we eat that lady shoulda eaten a skinny person. Although being chubby sorta worked for her, she was ya know rich, and talented, and famous. Some people have all the luck!

This is for you Mama Cass *clears throat* 
{Pretend I am singing loudly wearing my plaid pj pants and using my limegreen brush as a microphone}

. . .not that I would ever do that. . .

"Monday Monday, can't trust that day,
Monday Monday, sometimes it just turns out that way. . .Every other day, every other day,
Every other day of the week is fine, yeah
But whenever Monday comes, but whenever Monday comes
You can find me cryin' all of the time"

That having been said me, my pj pants, my bowl of dry fruit loops [which I eat like popcorn], and the bag of Sweet & Spicy trail mix are gonna attack my history homework like it owes us money.  Once we've beaten it within an inch of it's life we plan to dominate my English essay which is to be read in peer groups 

*that's fancy for having to strut your literary stuff to a bunch of bratty 20-something-year-olds who think they are better then you*

too bad for them that they don't know about the fact that I could pop out an essay in 20 minutes that would eat their essays for breakfast. The reason I don't talk much in class is because I am too busy ignoring all the dumb things that they are saying, NOT because I don't know the answer. . .duh.

Also take note that I am planning on eating something with the word "spicy" in the title. Yeah! That's happening! And this coming from a girl who thinks pepper is too hot. Bam. 

Truthfully I put my mouth through the torture of eating that stuff solely for the toffee covered peanuts. 
Yes, they are that good.

Monday-Hater Over and Out

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Jewelry is a girls best friend

I like to think I have substance, ya know...gusto. 

Oh but I don't.

How do I know?


My Aunt got me this:

 BAM {cute packaging}

 BAM BAM "Necklace of my dreams AhhHAhhhahhh" *Sung in a heavenly opera voice*

I sound like Emeril Lagasse up in this place. I love me some Emeril, nothin' wrong with a little chubby Italian dude shimmying around the kitchen working up pots of delicious goodness. Nope, nothin' wrong with that. 

Except ya know the calories. . .and the starch. . .and the fat. . .let's not forget the salt. . .

Okay so there may be a few things wrong with it, but I still dig the guy.

*holy random Cassie get back to business* 

Right-O, my Aunt sent me a necklace that I want to marry --lucky it, cause I am totally single-- and now she is my FAVORITE Aunt! 

Petty, unfair, shallow? I think not! My Aunt is hilarious! And fun! And kind, sweet, and understanding not to mention has excellent taste in Jewelry. 

The only way I could have loved this gift more is if she had sent me a little travel sized Emeril and a plate of noodles. . .all this Lagasse talk has me yearning for some pasta REAL BAD!

I wore this lovely today and I think it brought me good luck because I met a way cute boy today. He sorta knows I exist too. . .BONUS. . .

Thanks Aunt Ann, I love you!

Happy-Niece Over and Out

Friday, October 21, 2011

When it gets cold...

Once upon a time I was chilly as can be so I uttered these words,
"I want to own a polar bear and train it to hug me so that I will be warm and happy."

Mom looked at me calmly and replied, "Why not just buy a coat?" 

Why not, indeed?!? Oh I know cause that is boring and lame!

However, I think Mom is right on this one. Two separate situations led me to this conclusion
{neither of which was the fact that owning a polar bear is beyond unrealistic, I'm a dreamer. What can I say?} 

Situation Numero Uno: 

Al Gore is pretty sure that Polar Bears are drowning. . .I recently watched a documentary of his in which he looked like this. . . a lot
Now I'm not hatin' on him cause what he had to say made some sense. I got love for the dude but I'm not in love with all of him. Half the film was him boowhooin' it up because he didn't get to be President.
Seriously Mr. Gore?? Are you kidding me with this?? It's not as if you are in Kindergarten and someone stole your juice box. There was an election, where thousands of people voted, you lost. 
I'd say it's about time you get over it, if not for yourself, do it for the polar bears :) 
 This is one of the images he shows in his little video. 

"Ummm, excuse me Mr. Polar Bear, I don't want to bother you because I realize you are drowning and stuff, but would you like to come live in Missouri and hug me? Take your time getting back to me, you have about 5 good feet of ice left to sit on. No rush."

Bubble Busted! 

Situation Numero Dos:

Apparently polar bears aren't that nice. 

Katie's head would fit in that jaw, just sayin' 

My head is a bit rounder than most so I may be safe, but still. 

I hear they have tempers and I guess they will eat a human if the occasion arises. 

Bubble Busted Again!

New plan: Look into temperament of grizzly, black, and panda bears. 

Coats-Are-For-Losers Over and Out

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Before and After Business

Alright folks, I was putting pictures from my Mom's camera onto my computer today for the first time since she got it 2 years ago. . .yeah, that happened. Anywho the reason for this post is because I came across some pictures that both made me realize I use to be as huge as a house AND recognize how far I have come since then
. . .here we go. 
Hold onto your hats.
This is most definitely gonna be a bumpy ride: 

Before:  Two Thanksgivings ago (where I no doubt ate the whole myself...with my hands)
 After: This August

Before: At Kristine's Baby Shower 2 years ago
After: At a Field trip last Saturday

Okay two more and then I will stop this madness.

Before: Thanksgiving agian

After: Last August on our way to church :)

May I just say that my Mom is hot? Oh cause I just did! 

I am so proud of how far I have come.
I think sometimes we are just down right mean to ourselves. I know I still look in the mirror and pick myself apart, that is simply unfair.For look what I did!!! I did that! I changed me. 
I love me [in a not super stuck-up kind of way]
All this time I have been exercising and eating right and I did not know why. I had no real purpose in mind, well I am sure this was all in preparation for my next big adventure. I just know it. 

Skinny Over and Out

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

A Date With The Parentals

My dad is one lucky fella. Instead of having date night with just my mom he has been getting the opportunity to take me along as well. Like I said, Lucky Dad.

Last Friday he took us to see SIX in Branson. It was lovely. In fact the next morning I could hardly speak because I had cheered so loudly for those dudes. We had dinner there dad is an excellent date...nothing is too good for his girls.

There was cake. Cake = happiness and excess flub (the flub is totally worth it)
Those wiggly lines are where I could not resist tasting the raspberry drizzle.
I am not very lady like <---shocker? I think not.

Look at those big cuties! A match made in tan people heaven. I look like an albino walking along side these two. If people start calling me Powder we are gonna have to have words. Be forewarned name-callers I work out, I will hurt you.

So I am a lazy bones and did not feel like rotating this picture, try and pretend that it is facing right side up. I was trying to capture the ambiance of the Hughes Brothers Theater...that's an oil lamp by the way not a tea candle, fancy I know. Too bad our oil lamp was not full of oil and consequently burnt out before our food reached the table. Cheap-skates just sayin'.

Also this was sitting on our table:
That is how classy people beg for tips. Awesome. 

The best part of our date would have to be the LADY WITH THE RED FLAG she is kind of a big deal (hence the capital letters and underline)
So we are sitting up in the balcony because that is where dinner is served and we notice people streaming in and taking there seats waiting for the show to begin. Along comes this lady holding a red flag high in the air with full-grown adults following behind her as if she is the mother duck of the theater and they are the idiotic ducklings. 
I mentioned to my parents that there were a total of 6 people following her and could they not have done so without the ridiculous flag? I could have handled it if this scenario had happened only once but NOOO this dang lady comes in marching her troops over and over again. Even once the people were seated the lady kept walking holding that flag high. . .can you say power trip?? 

Look closely, past the baldy and the two old broads. . .there is that blasted flag and the six dummies following it. Best. Thing. Ever. 

I love going on dates with my parents, if you think that's lame you obviously haven't been paid for and lovingly taken care of without the weird "do I owe him a goodnight kiss?" thing hanging over your head.Yeah, I'll give you a minute to think about that!! In your face!

Third-Wheel Over and Out

Friday, October 14, 2011

"Are you feeling okay?" Code for "Hey! you look like Crap!"

So yesterday was a blaaa day. I got up and pretended to care. I put on clothes and combed my hair.
{that rhymes. . .giggle giggle}

I'll admit that by no means was I feeling hot-to-trot. I was tired and fussy and wanted to stay in bed FOR-EV-ER. It certainly did not make me feel like skipping through a field of daises when I walked into the shop and my father says, "Are you feeling okay *long pause* you look *more pausing and a gulp* tired." 

TRANSLATION: "Cassie you look like a steaming pile of ugly." 

I could have ignored my daddy, but a close friend of the family and a complete stranger verified his accusation. 

Well those three pictures show exactly how I feel about that. Bite me. So there.

Bella thinks I am beautiful and a rockstar. She wins, they lose.

Rockstar Over and Out

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Peanut Butter Jelly Time

Mama Smith made this jam. I think she might be a magician, because this stuff is magical let me just tell ya. I literally begged for a jar of it while I was at her house, like a homeless puppy or something equally pathetic and hungry.

This stuff is also magical. Which means Skippy must be a magician too. Obviously.

Yes, I am the kind of girl who spreads PB & J with a spoon. Deal with it.    

I am also the kind of girl who licks said spoon {this can't actually surprise you, if it does you're dumb}
This picture makes me want to sing Spice Girls. . .so I will . . . "Cause tonight is the night, when two become one!!"

MMMmmmm Peanut Butter!! My dad has been grumpy at me for not eating enough calories these last few days, he should be thrilled because peanut butter is jam packed with both calories AND fat! Bonus! I am not gonna lie, if peanut butter were a person I would totally Facebook stalk it. . .yep, I went there.

Dinner fit for a queen.

Nom Nomm Nommmm!!
What every college student wants to do after a long day of work and classes is devour a truly delectable snack, and its name is peanut butter and jelly. There are the occasional nay-sayers who think this snack is yucky. . .they are normally snooty-booties OR have peanut allergies {sissys}

Whatev. More for Cassie. 

PB & J Lover Over and Out

Monday, October 10, 2011

Love Me Some Sundays

Hi. I think I am stylish.

This is Katie's favorite, probably because I look like a royal imbecile {I was talking when she took this, I don't normally make this face. . .often}

Clearly could use a little work in the "model" department. . .okay so a lot of work, geez

Happy Sunday :)
Sundays are very special to me. I love getting up early and putting on my pretty face. <---oh yes, I have lots of different faces, don't believe me? Just try and eat the last slice of angel food cake and see what my face can do!! 

Taming my hair is always a time-consuming situation, this week I tried a heat-less curling technique that you do the night before! It worked!! If you want to try it go here. . .I will warn you that girl makes me want to stab my eyes with needles but it really does work so hang in there and curl your hairs!!!

Also I realize that my outfit DOES NOT MATCH! I like it that way! Fall is for mixing and matching (or in my case NOT matching) colors and patterns. I love fall!

I am working on self love. I want to be my best friend, not my best enemy. Yep, life is lovely. I am gonna go live mine :) 

Lover-of-myself Over and Out

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Modest is Hottest

"I find the whole concept of being ‘sexy’ embarrassing and confusing. If I do an interview with photographs people desperately want to change me - dye my hair blonder, pluck my eyebrows, give me a fringe. Then there’s the choice of clothes. I know everyone wants a picture of me in a mini-skirt. But that’s not me. I feel uncomfortable. I’d never go out in a mini-skirt. It’s nothing to do with protecting the Hermione image. I wouldn’t do that. Personally, I don’t actually think it’s even that sexy. What’s sexy about saying, ‘I’m here with my boobs out and a short skirt, have a look at everything I’ve got?’ My idea of sexy is that less is more. The less you reveal the more people can wonder. - Emma Watson

May I just say, "Holy WoW I am loving me some Emma Watson?!!!"  

I am not gonna lie, if Emma Watson was a LDS male returned missionary I would totally marry her. Alas she is not! Consequently I will just adore her for the beautiful example that she is!

It is so much fun to be modest!! <----weird statement, I know. But, think about it? When 'sexy' girls wear their ultra-skimpy, low-cut, skin-tight attire they are in constant need of adjusting. Pulling this down, tucking that in, shimmying instead of walking, and for what? To catch the eye of some complete stranger of the opposite sex? That is A LOT of work just so someone random can look at you like an object instead of a person. . . Fun = putting on an outfit that fits and makes you feel fresh and lovely, no adjustments necessary!

Boys may find the 'sexy' girls alluring from afar, but if they look close it's not so cute. It is like the clothes are trying to consume their wearers. If you have to fight with your outfit to get it on OR keep it on. . .I'd say it's not worth it!

Speaking of worth that is what it is REALLY about, your self-worth. Love yourself. For a girl who loves herself and shows it in her appearance and mannerisms will always be hotter then those who don't. 

"Be your own kind of beautiful" 

Modest Hottie Over and Out

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Ginger Lumberjack

The love of sisters is beyond measure, there is no such thing as "too hard", "too gross", or "too much information" with sisters if there is a will (in this case a razor) there is a way. 

Katie is the baby of the family, she is also preggo (which means she's HAVING a baby), and being the pregnant baby that she is when she expressed concern over her extremely long leg hair Kel and I decided to become Ginger Lumberjacks. Translation: Katie is a redhead = red leg hair = ginger
Katie can't breath when she bends over (apparently this is a common side effect of pregnancy) so her leg hair was much longer then any females leg hair EVER should be, it reminded me of a forest. One that must be chopped down = lumberjack.    

So we sat Kate down on a lovely stool right outside of the bathtub, lathered up her legs, and started choppin'
It didn't take long at all for us to correct the situation. We dried Kate's legs and then rubbed some yummy lotion on them. Yay for soft, silky legs!

Lessons Learned:
*Having sisters is one of God's greatest gifts to me
*Two razors is better then one
*When I get pregnant I am purposefully not shaving just so Kel and Kate will have to pamper me

Ginger Lumberjack Over and Out